Dear Jordan

I hope Dwight Howard throws down 50 on the Bobcats this year.

Probably won't happen, but in either case I'm writing Michael Jordan a letter.

Dear Mr. Jordan,

I hope you know what you have done to a whole nation that night you robbed Dwight Howard of his spot in the Slam Dunk final.

I have mourned 70 nights straight, without fail at least 30 minutes.

It breaks my heart that 7 footers around the world were unable to gleefully celebrate the triumph that was surely to come. Its tough enough on them that they are guaranteed back trouble, a life time of corny "wow you're so tall" comments and awkward attempts are specular dunks. But all of that pain could have been removed with a simple jester. Yes I know how you made a career out of posterizing 7 footers, so why would it be any different this time?

But for the love of god, couldn't you have made an exception just this once, and given the kid full marks!!

Take a look below. This is the dunk that was planned.




Now don't you see what you robbed us?

Instead all we can do is grieve at what could have been....perhaps you can find it in your heart to right this wrong, that we all...but especially myself have endured.

Sincerely,

Hardboiled Fiction

p.s. I will accept a cash payment of 2 million dollars for the pain I have suffered because of this.

Unmarked please.

Never Get Up Again

Some very bright minds were put to good use!

Seriously this is genius! Why would you ever want to get up off your fat ass and grab a cold one, when it could be launched to you?



The Hole - video powered by Metacafe

Now if only someone could find a cure to AIDS or cancer...

Fuck it, we have a beer launching fridge.

Two things I love:

1) YouTube

2) Random sports fans who think they have an educated opinion worth expressing to the world

This wouldn't have happened ten years ago. Just think, what a glorious age to be a sports fan browsing the net for spring training updates on your rotisserie team's #6 pitcher. Instead of something valuable, I get this....

Awesome.




After watching this painful exercise, I prayed for forgiveness from the Media gods for thinking unjust cruel thoughts about them over the past year. I may want to shove Joe Buck's insight up the tiny hole located on his ass, but I could be subjected to worst....say for example people who talk like...well for lack of a better example these dim witted fanatics.